I LOVE MY MACHETE

Last night between 12:00AM and 2:30 AM I was hunting. I was up late with some odd insomnia and I decided to go into my kitchen to eats something because that usually helps me fall asleep. Full stomachs make for good sleep.

I hear something and call for Yana. I have no idea what I thought she would do, but I just did not want to be alone. I didn´t this he would have protected me, but at least i didn´t want to hunt alone. We both saw something, at first I thought that it was a huge spider leg. A spider leg the size of a rule. The leg freaked her out and she started barking, ladrando, ladrando, When she began barking she scared me and I yelled some senseless gibberish. Through our odd yells we scared the whatever it was and it came out from behind the stove. What I had thought was a leg turned out to be a long long tail. It was a rat the size of my brother Noah, or at least a cat. It was the ugliest thing I have ever seen. It actually went into attach mode and came for me and following the blockbuster model Yana jumped in front of me and fought the huge rat. Yana scared the rat enough for it to go into retreat and she chased it around my kitchen for a good five minutes. Once I realize that the rat was to agile for my puppy I decided I should get involved.

She was chasing it up the wall and the rat was so huge it couldn´t squeeze out any of the wholes that fill my wall. When it would sit on to of a table or counter I would scare it off and Yana would take over again. Yana cornered the rat. It was stuck in a ceiling corner unable to move, Yana was just waiting for it to fall then she would have massacred the rat.

It was a stalemate.

Like in all emergency situations it felt like it all happened so fast even though it took place over about fifteen minutes. Everything is foggy even this next part. I looked around for what I could use to knock the rat down. I saw my broom, a nice blunt object and my machete. I went for the machete that now is always very sharp, and swung at the rat expecting for it to fall down to Yana. Instead the rat exploded with the force of my mighty yielding. I looked around for the intact body, but nothing of the sort could be found. The guts were on the wall, the head portion was on the floor, and yana had nothing but the tail and legs. It was awesome, gross, but awesome.

At this point I realized I had woken up my neighbors because I had been yelling for a good ten minutes non stop, telling Yana to "get´em".

Beyond this I felt very accomplish. I had been talking with a good friend out on the Galapagos about feeling like I felt like such a dork sometimes because at the end of some days I feel like I have accomplished nothing. Right after that I did this little bit of hunting and felt like I had really done something. Advice: On those days that you feel like you have not accomplished anything, where you feel like you don´t understand what your doing with you life, resolve this feeling quickly and fully. Find a rat and kill it with a machete.